also check my audio : https://soundcloud.com/rawrandom/people-pleaserThere are two meanings and conception about People Pleaser
And thank god i'm the first one, not that i would measure myself as the 'nicest' or 'helpful' person but atleast i don't lie to people to make them feel good.
But yes, i force myself or what you call somewhat 'fake' just to make myself look more fit in this environment we have.
Especially on Middle School and High School i have to be somebody that loved by someone, to be friends with someone, to actually communicate to someone, to have status. Because little do you know, we have caste or status level especially on school environment.
The more popular or rich you are the more high your status level will be. Take an example from class. I know that in class there are always these people who are shy/wall flowers, the popular boy, the smart one, the jokester, the teacher pet, and the rich.
Being the people pleaser i am i notice that i always doesn't exceed people expectation. I always feeling less and haven't done more for people while the reality are i haven't done lot for MYSELF. I put others needs first then myself even though it hurts me i just go with it. If people are happy i am happy. But the most hurtful thing is that sometimes i want them to do the same thing i did with them, like vice verse but it doesn't happen. I'm too high on expectation and always dream big and that what mostly hurt me mentally.
I often buy my friends food and do stuff to cheer them up when they are sad or when they vent about something. I thought the most helpful thing to do is to listen to them and just make them feel good rather than judge them. Sometimes my action or what i do to people is what i want people to do to me too (The good things, the positive things).
It's not gonna happen. Wake up Nadhira! Your expectation are too high.
Even though i knew this was one of my mistakes too (making an expectation over people) i still do it too.
On Group projects too, my leadership aura has naturally come by itself and sometimes i don't understand why i'm taking all this work for no credit. Why am i taking someone else's job and making it my job. Why am i always be the leader in the project even though i don't want to. Oh yeah, I RARELY SAY NO. Because of my chitty chat mouth and perfectionist trait i always want to do my stuff as my stuff even though it is a group project and people often just rely on me.
"Oh Nadhira is on our team okay let's do nothing and the project will finish itself"
Thank you BOY o for your indirect compliment.
Being the people pleaser i am i will always reach that dream girl i drawn to be. I always picture myself that i will be the most lovable human on the planet while you CANNOT.
Even propher Muhammad SAW who Allah SWT gave miracle and everything has a haters. And here you are just a girl writing this rant down on the internet telling people you don't want no haters. Well you can't
In the end you will never exceed someone expectations.
and don't forget sometimes people will manipulated you and say nice things to you while actually they're taking advantages to you (not all people and please don't suudzon too).