Mono No Aware, 物の哀れ

 here i am again, 

crying, after i think about you and what would we be in the future.

crying if we could ever meet again.

crying because sometimes i can't take this anymore.

i don't want to fear myself with you.

i don't want to hide ourself.

i don't want this relationship to just fade.

it's like we're playing cats and dogs with the world.

i want to shout to the world.

hug you in the bridge where people could see us.

i wanna know that we belong together.

i want you to come by to my house and have a lunch with my family before picking me up.

and i want to have dinner and chill conversation with your parents.

but here i am again

crying.

because i'm such a loser.

i'm a coward for not being able to be brave enough.

to tell my parents about it

to be frank with them.

and just keeping my feelings all by myself.

every time i think about it my heart shanked,

shatter into pieces,

eyes started swelling,

pounding my chest as if it was already broken inside.

"what would they thought about it?"
"would they be okay?"
"would they be mad?"
"would they be understanding?"

but i couldn't try to get the answer myself because my feet aren't brave enough.

I haven't gotten the courage to tell.

I'm tired.

I'm tired i have to keep it from them.

I'm tired i can't be free with them when i'm with you.

To tell them that you're gonna keep me safe.

To tell them that i am okay with you.

To tell them to accept you and accepting each other.

To tell them how happy i am around you.

To tell them.. maybe i already found my home.